Ehhhhhh screw today!

I feel like today is the hardest day of this week. I am feeling aggravated with everything. I feel like I deserve to buy something for myself. I'm mad, I'm bored, I have been working hard, I have been enjoying so little. A part of me feels insecure and questionable about myself and everything around me.....Just one shirt, just one lunch out, just one neon scarf...
it would make me feel so much better. I would have these new things. Whatever I decided on would make me only a little less mad, it wouldn't cure my boredom that long since shopping only takes so long, it would be something that I would enjoy until I realized how low my bank account is. It would only temporarily make me feel less insecure, but then it would make me even more questionable about myself because I couldn't last more than 5 days without caving.
This sucks.......
I am going to try my best to improve my mood from this point on.  I only have a couple hours left of work and then I am going running, which I've skipped out on the past couple days. That usually helps me feel better about myself. When I get home, I'm going to have a nice relaxing night that includes a bath and a chick flick. None of which I am going to feel bad about.... maybe I'll even up the girly and do my nails. I hope that tomorrow is a better day............................ For now, I will directly go look at some cute kitten pictures and hope that the rest of the work day goes a little quicker.

Trying to stay positive

Yesterday I ended up spending $206 at the dentist... which is just crazy in my book but, since I may need teeth in the future, I paid it. This was far more than I was hoping to be charged. I ended up switching my hair appointment to next paycheck, which left me with $40 in savings. Here is the new budget break down

 

$167-Prespent

$645-Rent

$60-Food

$74-Books

$16-Phone

$10-Gym

$206 Dentist

***** Savings of $40

Looking at the small amount of savings for this check makes me sad. A part of me wants to say fuck it, it is only $40- let's buy something pretty. Yet, another part of me realizes that I would have paid for the dentist appointment whether I was on this spending fast or not. Before I would have eventually over drafted my account since I have nothing left in savings. So in a way, I guess I am okay with the fact that what I wanted to save was spent instead of me overdrafing.

I am hopeful that I can budget my next check in a way that gives the old savings account the boost it needs.

Until then I am going to stay positive that I can make this work....