Last night I bought my $60 worth of groceries and beer. I drank all of the beer and then I drank all of my boyfriend's. Then I smoked, a lot, which is just one more thing that I didn't want to do this year. I have been kicking myself for the amount of excess that occured yesterday. I know that this acting out was not right. I am down to $14. I hope that I can actually put something into savings with my next check. Hopefully the next week without any cash will be more successful-since the only way that I can spend is if I overdraft.
I know that my acting out last night was just fear. This fear of change is holding me back. I don't know why I am so terrified of. I realize now that the change I want is going to be hard work. I am not letting this set back ruin my plan for the new year. I am going to look at this set back as a learning experience and hope for the best.
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